Beautyland by Marie-Helene Bertino
E.T. fax home
If you follow any literature-focused media outlets, you’ve likely seen the praises of Beautyland being sung from their proverbial rooftops. It made, give or take, 93 million best-of-2024 lists. A few choice quotes that I found through extensive research of pulling up the wiki page:
“Astonishing” - New York Times
“Shimmering masterpiece from an author with talent to spare” - The Boston Globe
“Is this what it feels to play God? To watch a life untangle from above, to witness the profound in the mundane?” - The Brooklyn Rail
Obviously, I was ready to hate it. Oh well. Thwarted again. This is a delight. Read on to find out why.
Spoiler-Free Summary
Adina Giorno is born on the same day that Voyager 1 lifts off, and soon discovers that she is not in fact the human child others assume her to be; she is an alien sent to observe and report on human life. She communicates her findings to her “superiors” through a fax machine, and is sometimes visited by her true brethren in her dreams. The story follows Adina’s life against the backdrop of this unusual situation.
Doesn’t that sound like the stupidest thing you’ve ever heard? And yet…
The Good
We are in an unoriginality epidemic. This is most apparent in Hollywood, where nearly every movie is either a sequel or reboot to an existing IP. It makes sense, in a way; it costs so much time, effort, and especially money to produce any theatrical film, that the allure of a built in audience and lower risk investment is too good to pass up. This isn’t quite as pronounced in the book world, but how many dystopian YA novels came out after The Hunger Games? How many “romantasy” novels are we seeing now, following Rebecca Yarros and Sarah Maas’ success?1
Well, here’s the good news. Beautyland is wholly, unapologetically, deeply original.
The first thing you’ll notice is the prose. It’s kind of…clipped, in a way? Lots of short, punchy phrases, occasionally interrupted by page-long sentences. All in present tense, which you don’t see all too often. Bertino has this way of distilling an interaction down to its very essential component, and does not worry about setting the scene or closing it out logically. At first, I found this a little disorienting, as the narrative can jump between scenes very abruptly. However, as you read, you start to fall into her rhythm. I’ll try to explain it, but fear I’ll fall short; we all have those memories where one line or one image sticks out to you, maybe for no good reason. Just the way that someone inflected a certain syllable, or the way they swirled a drink just so, or a time you said something awkward and waited for everyone to swivel and mock you, but no one did, and you feel like life gave you a free pass that one time. You don’t necessarily remember any context around those moments, and Bertino is 100% fine with that. She’ll give you that moment, and move on. The rest is, by definition, not memorable.
Then, there’s Adina. She’s one of the more lovable characters I’ve come across in recent memory. She is a host of contradictions: relatable and quirky, wary and calm, whip-smart and naive. Adina navigates the world in yet another contradiction, in that she is deeply entrenched and affected by it while staying detached and objective (mostly). If you can’t find something within her that reminds you of yourself, then you might be the alien.2
Finally, there are the observations that Adina makes to her Superiors about the human condition. You’ll find a sampling in the memorable quotes bit below, but they are unique, insightful, and cutting. This is not a typical, “Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?!” kind of hokey-ness. The wit and perceptivity here could cut steel.
The Bad
I had two minor quibbles with this book. They’re minimal, but I have to put something here.
The prose can be distracting, at first. As previously stated, it took a minute to fall in line with Bertino’s writing style. Give it time, and I think you’ll be rewarded, but at first it doesn’t sound like many other books you’ll have read. You may find that refreshing, annoying, or both.
The plot is fine. It’s not earth-shattering. This is a book about character and premise, not so much plot. That’s ok! In fact, an intricately woven plot may have been too much for this book to carry, and we really want Adina and her observations to shine. That being said, if you’re looking for twists and revelations, you won’t find them here.
Like I said, minimal.
Memorable Quotes
So many. Here’s a few.
Human beings…rip their addresses of old magazines when they donate them to hair salons. This is how criminals find their victims: They search stacks of People magazines. If they find one where the address has been left on, they think: What a fool. I will go to her house and murder her.
We always did this growing up and now I feel silly.
Every human dies. But the bad news is that every day they act like they don’t know they’re alive. They lie or behave inconsiderately or cheat. Each one is a little death. Humans experience many little deaths before the final one.
Ugh.
<Adina is at an event where folks are starting to lose interest in the minor celebrity there> The Famous Writer is losing her grip on her followers. She says, loudly, “I grew up poor. I didn’t have a car or a smart phone or anything.”
Adina knows this means she grew up with money. People with money list what they did without. Poor people list what they had.
Emphasis mine. Damn.
Hair and nails grow and are cut. Limbs lengthen. Daughter asks for a dog and mother says no. Daughter asks well how about pierced ears then IF SHE IS EXPECTED TO LIVE IN THIS DOGLESS HELL.
Emphasis intact from the book. This is also a good example of the prose. Also it made me laugh out loud.
Personal Experience
I had a great time reading this novel. In the spirit of complete honesty, it is not the kind of thing I normally go for - no one was even murdered or psychotic, for crying out loud - but it was a refreshing palate cleanser from that stuff.
Actually, palate cleanser is inaccurate, as it implies a book that is fluff and forgettable, and Beautyland is anything but that. It is so many things, and more than anything else, it is human.3
Who Should Read This?
Rating
Beautyland receives 4.75 fax machines. A rating that is….out of this world.4
Next Up
Until then, keep your eyes to the stars.
And hey, no shade. I haven’t read anything from Yarros or Maas, but I hear great things.
Which, coincidentally, would give you something in common with her.
Or, I guess, alien.
I had to, at least once.